


Scene 6, Take 18

by orphan_account



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Episode: s01e01 Tourist Trapped, Episode: s02e10 Northwest Mansion Mystery, Fluff and Crack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-27
Updated: 2016-09-15
Packaged: 2018-07-27 01:55:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7598929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was inspired by the thought of Dipper in a recording booth, and it just spiraled off from there. </p><p>So, now you can enjoy minute chapters of the Mystery Shack Crew screwing off and messing up their lines in the TV show we all know and love!</p><p>Tourist Trapped | Northwest Mansion Noir | possibly . . . Into the Bunker . . . But we have yet to see</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Trapped Tragedy

Camera shows the twins careening wildly in the golf cart

Mabel looks behind them, and a look of terror passes over her face. “It's getting closer!”

The camera gets an aerial view of the shadow of the giant creature chasing them. 

Suddenly, however, the creature trips and we get a blurry flash of red when all the gnomes come crashing down. 

“Agh!” Mabel shrieks as they suddenly get bombarded by gnomes. “Dipper, Dipper, stop, you're gonna run over them!” A terrible screeching can be heard as Dipper pounds on the brakes. 

“That was not my fault.” Jeff climbs onto the golf cart and pointed an accusing finger at them. “You guys were going too slow.” 

“Aw, what! You were like, five yards away from us!” Dipper cries. 

“Bro - bro, they were kinda close.” Mabel tells him. 

He glares at her. “Whose side are you on?” 

“Well you weren't the one who looked back at them!”

 

-_

 

Voice recording

“And then there was our Great Uncle Stan. That guy. Who is apparently choking. You okay?” Giggling in the background. “You need someone to hit you on the back?”

“I don't think those were your lines.”

“Oh, oops. Sorry.”

 

-_

 

“I wouldn't be surprised if the man of my dreams walked through that door right now.” Mabel finished with a confident smile on her face.

Stanley walked through, belching and holding signs. “Ugh, oh, not good.” 

“Urgh, oh, why?” Mabel whined while Dipper laughed.

“Alright, alright, look alive, people, I need someone to hammer up these signs in the spooky part of the forest.” Stan said, holding out the signs.

“Not it.” Dipper said immediately.

“Not it!” Mabel echoed.

“Uh, also not it.” Soos said, the camera view moving to get him in.

“Nobody asked you Soos.” Stan deadpanned, disguising his ‘not your line, Soos.’

Yet, Soos took it in stride. “I know. And I'm comfortable with that.” He pulled out a chocolate bar and bit into it. 

“Oh, my gosh, cut! Cut!” Alex cried out. He paused to laugh. 

“Sorry, Dude. I felt like it.” Soos said.

“No, no, that was great! I'm keeping it.” 

“Yuss.” Soos self-congratulated himself.

 

-_

 

“Grunkle Stan, whenever I'm in those woods I feel like I'm being watched!” Dipper protested.

Camera switches to Stanley, who acts irritable and rubs his temples. “Ugh, this again.”

“I'm telling you, something weird is going on in this town! Just today my mosquito bites spelled out ‘beware.’” He pulled up his sleeve to show Stan his ‘mosquito bites.’

Stan’s face immediately takes on a ‘seriously, Dipper?’ look. “That says ‘bewarb.”

Dipper blushes and looks down at his arm. Sure enough, the makeup had smeared and it now said bewarb. “Oh…oops.”

-_

 

“Ugh, Grunkle Stan never believes anything I sa - OW!” Dipper drops the hammer and yelps, nursing his hand. 

“Oh, wow, Dip, so clichè!” Mabel yelled from off-set, shrieking with laughter

-_

 

“Think again, sister, SHEBAM!” He then acted surprised and flipped the pages. “Oh, wait, SHEBAM!” 

Mabel was grinning. “Oh, yes, brother dear, he's definitely a squash with human face and emotions.” 

“Wait, what?” Dipper looked back down at the page. Sure enough, there on the top of the page, clearly labeled, Squash with Human Face and Emotions. “Aw, come on!”

“Hey, I am offended by that!” Jeff yelled from offset, as well as over Mabel, who was laughing hard now.

-_

 

“Weaknesses: un-gnome - I mean unknown!” Dipper quickly corrects himself, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment. From somewhere off camera, Mabel starts laughing, as well as a couple of mentioned gnomes.

“Oh, wow. That was just spectacular.” Jeff comments dryly, off camera.

“I'm sorry!” Dipper says. 

“Yeah, nice goin’ bro-!”

-_

 

Mabel swung the leafblower back and forth. “Yes, yes! Bow before me, puny mortals, for I am the LEAF QUEEN!” 

Dipper snickered next to her. “Yes, yes, you are.”

-_

 

Stan looked around suspiciously before backing into the open vending machine. “You saw nothing…” He whispered before it closed. 

Laughing can be heard before the camera cuts off.


	2. Northwest Mansion Not-Really

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here it is. You wanted it, I provided. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

“Preston,” Priscilla says in a fanciful tone. “I must say, the guest list for this year's party has so much diversity!”

“Yes,” Preston grabs the newspaper prop off a platter. “A nice mix of millionaires and billionaires!” He looks over to an extra placing silverware “incorrectly” on the table. He turns to whack him with the newspaper but the extra looked up too early and he ended up hitting him hard in the face.

Offset, Mabel and Pacifica burst out laughing.

“Oh, no! I'm sorry!” Preston exclaimed as the extra massaged his nose. “Are you okay?” The extra, laughing, nods. Preston laughs with him, looking at the camera.

-_

“Okay, everybody, you ready?” Dipper whispered. Behind him, Mabel, Stan, and Alex nod. Biting his lip to prevent himself from laughing, Dipper inches forward, looking at the set. “Almost time . . .” He tells the rest of the group. A-a-a-and…NOW!” He yells, running forward and throwing cheap plastic plates and cups at the set and everyone in it. Dipper laughed at their cries of surprise. He looked back at the rest of the Sabotage Team. Stan was throwing plastic utensils, Alex had thrown his plates and was now laughing along with the crew, and Mabel was still throwing every bit and piece she had left.

“Di-i-i-i-peerrrrrrr!” Pacifica whined. “Why didn't you tell me!” Dipper laughed.

-_

“And that's not just jealousy talking, I would say that to her face.” Dipper recited his lines and turned to open the door.

“I need your help.” Dipper stared at her for a few seconds before breaking out a smile and giggling as he does on serious moments.

“Agh! Dipper! Not again!” Pacifica shouted, not being able to help but smile at him, but by then Dipper was laughing too hard to respond.

“C’mon, bro-bro, you can go once without ruining the seriousness!”

-_

“Funny, I thought it was lying about founding the town.” Dipper said as he flicked a bob on a picture frame.

“Don't touch that!” Dipper put his hands up, trying to bite back a smile until the scene ended, but ultimately failed.

(“Come on, Dipper!” “I'm sorry!”)

-_

“Ancient blood and blackened skies, the forest dark shall once more rise.” The heads chanted ominously.

The shot turned to Pacifica shaking Dipper in panic. “What do we do, what do we do!” She shouted.

“Uh, don't worry, it can't get worse than this.” Dipper said.

The fire flared and the two stepped back. A giant skeletal hand reached out, followed by another.

“YES. IT. CAN!” The lumberjack boomed as he pulled himself out.

“I…don't think those were your lines.” Dipper said.

“DOES IT LOOK LIKE I CARE.” The two tweens burst out laughing.

-_

“‘Here we will enjoy only the finest tastes and only the snootiest of laughter.’” Pacifica read off the script. Mabel, who was walking by and heard only the last part, crowed, “A-HAOH, A-HAOH, HAOH, A-HAOH, HAOH, HAOH!!” And kept walking past, giggling.

Pacifica looked up from the script and stared at her as she walked away. “What the heck…” Mabel laughs louder. “…you weirdo…”

-_

“... A curse passed down until this day…” The Lumberjack finished ominously.

Dipper frowned. “So, wait a minute; the Northwests knew this haunting was coming? And they tricked me into helping them to avoid ghostly justice?” He sighed dramatically. “That little butt.” Snickers off-set.

Faintly, before the camera closes, “Hey!”

-_

“Keep him away from bright lights, he gets…grabby.”

“NORTHWESTS!” The doors fly open wildly. “OW!” Dipper exclaims, favoring his wrist. “That HURTS like HECK! WHY didn't anyone TELL ME ABOUT THAT!”

“Pfffft-! You dork!” Pacifica shakes her head, holding back laughter.

-_

Mabel jauntily walks up to Marius. “Hi, I'm Mabel! So! Australia, huh? Do you guys eat kangaroo meat up there or are they…strictly pets?”

“I am from Austria. There is a difference, Mabel.” He corrected. She covered her mouth to try and not laugh.

“Seriously! Again!” Marius throws his hands up in exasperation. “Seriously, you nag your brother for it but you're honestly just as bad!”

“I'm already trying not to laugh!” She gasps, laughing loudly. “These lines aren't helping!”

-_

Pacifica reached up to pull the lever, but was interrupted by her parents.

“Pacifica Elise Northwest, you stop this instant! We can't let the town see us like this! We have a reputation to uphold! Now come into the panic room. There's enough mini sandwiches and oxygen to last you, me, and a butler for a week. We’ll eat the butler.”

Pacifica looked around at the scene in front of her. Then reached her hand back up.

“You dare disobey us?” Preston asked warningly, pulling out the bell and ringing it loud and clear.

Pacifica hesitated, closing her eyes and clenching her fist to drown out the sound of the bell.

“Ding-a-ly, ding-a-ly! Is this bell broken?”

Pacifica stomped her foot down. “No, I just do what I wanna do, suckah!” She said, pulling the lever down and letting the townsfolk in. She flung her arms up in the air. “WHOOOO!” She pointed at Preston and Priscilla. “This is America, peoples, I'm free to do what I wanna do!”

Laughter before the camera closes.

-_

As the camera pans to a tapestry of Bill, you can hear a menacing, echoing laughter.

“You can deny all you want Pine Tree, but you can’t deny the upcoming apocalypse…”

“What the _hell_ are you doing here, Bill, get out.”

“Wrong episode, you idiot!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra coolness points for anyone who can guess who said what at the end :)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, if enough people like this I'll continue with it, so comment if you wanna see more and if there is a specific episode you want, and I'll try my best! :D


End file.
